It has been an amazing time but also the saddest and loneliest time for me. As every time I do anything, any milestone, there is the realisation that I do not have my mummy here with me to share this special time and to help me out, I know she would have been with me every step of the way, this is such a special time that should be shared between a mother and her daughter, the birth of her child.I just have not had the support that my mum would have given me which has been extremely difficult. The harsh reality that my little girl will never meet her Ginny, the most wonderful woman and mummy in the world, has become all too real lately. I can only hope I am half the mother to Chloe that my mum was to all of us.
I have been blessed with a great family and a wonderful husband. I definitely now know why it takes two people to make a baby, you definitely need two people to raise a baby and a great support behind you.
Chloe has been an absolute joy and an amazing addition to our family. This time has been the most amazing time of my life being able to be home and watch as my little princess grows, learns and becomes a little person. I can't believe how quickly the time has gone.
Chloe can now:-
- sit up by herself, still a bit wobbly but she is doing very well;
- likes her story time with Shane;
- is reaching out to grab toys/items that she sees and wants;
- reaches out to be picked up;
- cannot sleep without her sleep-suit, do not even try, we tried one extremely hot night and she screamed the house down;
- Has become very vocal and likes to "talk" constantly;
- likes "song time" where I do a mini version of mum's baby bounce;
- her favourite toys are Sally (a Lamaze toy) and Violet - Violet sings a song with Chloe's name in it and it makes her smile;
- goes to sleep to the night time music played by Violet;
- has started to giggle, especially at Shane playing with her;
- has about 3 x 40 minute sleeps during the day;
- normally sleeps well at night about 11-13 hours with 1 break for a feed (not at the moment very disrupted at the moment);
- has just started solids, she has tried avocado (apparently the most similar food in fatty acid composition to breast milk) and also sweet potato mixed with breast milk and some banana as a finger food. She enjoys all of these, what little she actually takes in;
- still refuses to take a bottle of expressed milk (why would you when you can get it from the source);
- drinks water from a sippy cup and also from any glass I am drinking from, always wants a drink of what I am drinking;
- recognises her name;
- is wary of strangers, definitely knows mum and dad from others;
- loves the jolly jumper, her walker and going in the spa.
Since writing about her 3 months ago we have been very busy.
Early November brought a trip with poppy to Kingaroy to visit aunty Kirsty, uncle Michael and cousins Natalie, Charlotte and Sammuel. We had a great time seeing their new house and school. It was a surprise visit and boy did we surprise them. We met them at the school and the look on Kirsty's face not to mention the scream of delight to see us was worth every second.
We adventured around Kingaroy and also took the opportunity to take some gorgeous photos of Chloe with Poppy's amazing camera. It was so good to spend time with Kirsty and her family, we had such a good time, even Chloe settled in after the first night.
We had a couple of days at home then headed down to Ballina to spend some time with Poppy and aunty Amy and uncle Tones, before their wedding. Tried to help out with a few wedding type things, including a tasting of the wedding food and just hang out which was really nice, always love going to Ballina.
Before I knew it, it was December and we were headed back to Ballina for Amy's hen's night. Chloe also came to the hen's night at Amy Black's house, as she refused and still does refuse to take a bottle - even though its expressed breast milk. Chloe was great and was a hit with everyone, she even got sleeps in porta-cot supplied by the lovely Amy Black.
We made a quick mid week dash back to Brisbane to celebrate Shane's birthday where Chloe gave him some framed photographs of her that were taken in Kingaroy, she is pretty clever.
It was then back to Ballina for wedding prep, including pedicure and manicure (while uncle Michael and cousins looked after Chloe) and wedding rehearsal and dinner.
Finally it was the wedding day, a big day for everyone. Shane looked after Chloe all day, and brought her to me when she needed feeds. It was so exciting getting ready and spending the time with my sisters and Amy's close friends. Amy looked amazing, she was the most stunning bride ever, and Tones scrubbed up alright too. It was a great day but very long for Chloe. She managed to survive until just after the speeches but it all got too much, Shane drove around and put her to sleep while I said a very quick goodbye to everyone.
Before you know it, it was Christmas day. We had a quiet Christmas with just our small family but it was so fun to watch Chloe's face and look of amazement as we opened all her presents, she was spoiled by family. She had a very disrupted Christmas/New Year period with bad sleeping and hot days/nights.
Chloe has just started solids, its a little earlier than I would like (all I constantly hear in my head is mum saying "just because they are interested in food, doesn't mean they need it") however, I decided to start now, so there will be less of a disruption to her when I go back to work. I did not want to have to her dealing with a new routine and environment and starting solids, too much for a little baby.
Now we are preparing her for family day care, which she will start in 5 weeks, when I have to return to work. We are working on a transition program with my amazing friend Louise who will take fantastic care of her. I am so sad that I have to return to work and leave my baby girl, but I also looking forward to it. It has been so special having this time to spend with my baby girl and I will treasure it for ever, I wish it could last longer but the reality is we need somewhere to live and we need to eat etc.